I did not see it coming that Hank would push his daughter under to save himself. But that really does say it all. (Also loved the link to Apollo's entitled violence.) The baby beaver knocked me over. This is a beautiful masterpiece of a story, Julie.
Awww! Thanks so much, Mary Beth. You've made my day. In fairness to Hank, and as a former lifeguard yourself, it's not uncommon for drowning people to panic and be quite dangerous to their would-be rescuer. Hence, coming at them from behind? Does that track w/ your training?
I've been thinking so much about that. This story might come after that one in the Hank chronology. But mainly I've been worried, people are going to think - geez, is EVERY story involving this guy a near-drowning?? How many times can one guy drown before he gets the message?! 😂😱
Oh Hank doesn't seem super receptive to the message so...🤷♀️ thinking more on it, the rowing before Undine incidents may make the most sense and I am dying to know what happens next. If pushing his daughter under doesn't wake him...
I was actually wondering if it’s ambiguous at the end whether Hank even lives. I had no intention of killing him off, but it’s not 100% clear one way or the other. 🤷🏼♀️
I saved both parts to read when I had plenty of time to savor. You did not disappoint, Julie! You have a gift for imparting your passion for the earth into story. I was right there in the forest, mourning that little kit, mind numbed by the incomprehensible noise of the pump—a sound I wish I wasn’t familiar with.this is a way of fighting for the natural world. Your stories are powerful.
Wow, Julie, I was so stressed at the end and I mean that in a good way. It was a really dynamic and frightening scene! So many great lines with the beavers especially.
What an ending! I really had no idea where this story was going. But I couldn’t stop reading once I started. You’ve also got me looking up Greek Mythology. It’s also hard to tell if these beings are heroes or villains, or in this case, both. I’m always amazed at the number of people who don’t know how to swim. The unnecessary drownings. As much as I have always loved the water and am a strong swimmer, I respect its power. Bravo on telling a story with an important lesson (I can’t believe, with all we know, that fracking is still legal) without being heavy handed or preachy!
Thank you, Sally. It helps to hear what landed for you, and what worked. Not hitting people over the head with an agenda has taken years of concerted effort. It seems to be my default mode. 😉
A slow moving current to a fast flushing drain of pacing. From "You don’t need to worry, hon. It’s . . . business" to "Responsible to who?" to "Whose laking these sacrifices?"
I did not see it coming that Hank would push his daughter under to save himself. But that really does say it all. (Also loved the link to Apollo's entitled violence.) The baby beaver knocked me over. This is a beautiful masterpiece of a story, Julie.
Awww! Thanks so much, Mary Beth. You've made my day. In fairness to Hank, and as a former lifeguard yourself, it's not uncommon for drowning people to panic and be quite dangerous to their would-be rescuer. Hence, coming at them from behind? Does that track w/ your training?
It absolutely tracks. I hope this appalling (albeit panicked) act is what makes him face his fears and go rowing...😘
I've been thinking so much about that. This story might come after that one in the Hank chronology. But mainly I've been worried, people are going to think - geez, is EVERY story involving this guy a near-drowning?? How many times can one guy drown before he gets the message?! 😂😱
Oh Hank doesn't seem super receptive to the message so...🤷♀️ thinking more on it, the rowing before Undine incidents may make the most sense and I am dying to know what happens next. If pushing his daughter under doesn't wake him...
I was actually wondering if it’s ambiguous at the end whether Hank even lives. I had no intention of killing him off, but it’s not 100% clear one way or the other. 🤷🏼♀️
Oh! I figured since he coughed, he made it. But it's true there is room for the possibility his cold face is *that kind of cold.
I saved both parts to read when I had plenty of time to savor. You did not disappoint, Julie! You have a gift for imparting your passion for the earth into story. I was right there in the forest, mourning that little kit, mind numbed by the incomprehensible noise of the pump—a sound I wish I wasn’t familiar with.this is a way of fighting for the natural world. Your stories are powerful.
Thank you so much, Laura! I really appreciate your reading and especially taking the time to share your response. 💚
Wow, Julie, I was so stressed at the end and I mean that in a good way. It was a really dynamic and frightening scene! So many great lines with the beavers especially.
PS I also love the new logo :)
Thanks for reading. It’s so helpful to hear how it lands. 💚
Also, your new logo!!!!💚💚💚🐌🐌🐌
Testing it out, still refining, thanks for noticing!
What an ending! I really had no idea where this story was going. But I couldn’t stop reading once I started. You’ve also got me looking up Greek Mythology. It’s also hard to tell if these beings are heroes or villains, or in this case, both. I’m always amazed at the number of people who don’t know how to swim. The unnecessary drownings. As much as I have always loved the water and am a strong swimmer, I respect its power. Bravo on telling a story with an important lesson (I can’t believe, with all we know, that fracking is still legal) without being heavy handed or preachy!
Thank you, Sally. It helps to hear what landed for you, and what worked. Not hitting people over the head with an agenda has taken years of concerted effort. It seems to be my default mode. 😉
A slow moving current to a fast flushing drain of pacing. From "You don’t need to worry, hon. It’s . . . business" to "Responsible to who?" to "Whose laking these sacrifices?"
I appreciate your noticing this, Stacy. I love working on these shorter pieces, so I can grapple with and practice pacing at a manageable scale.
For me it was very visceral.
Julie, what jumped out for me was the rapacious-ness that runs like a cord connecting Apollo and Hank (and what he represents).
AA-HA! Thanks for sharing that, Priya. And thanks for reading and sharing! 💚